livin' down by the river...

Back in July I had the privilege to go white water rafting in Riggins, ID with a youth camp as a guide. For a solid week I took high school students from various churches down the river for many of them, their first time. I spent my mornings and evenings after being on the river, overlooking the river bank and gazing upon God's marvelous, though fallen countryside. Full of wildlife and the sweet sounds of calm, it was truly a blessing to me. Though the kids were more exhausting than the rafting we did, many of them had a good time and had their share of water. There is nothing like going through a rapid with waves the size of a large truck that you are about to crash through without even getting hurt. It sure beats being hit by a car while riding your bike at six in the morning! My favorite thing however is flipping the raft, intentionally in the rapid or not. Having been rafting for the last ten years of my life, I have body floated or swam in/through more rapids than i can count. There is an awesome website that you can see some amazing pictures of me in the water at http://klobetanz.smugmug.com/Rafts-2010/Private-boaters-July-rafting/july22/13139502_QfXve#954212829_RcRuz . At some point I will be posting a video, or a link to watch a video of me rafting as well. here are some pics of where i was staying, enjoy!

Morning view from my tent!

through painful loss, Love abides for thee...

I am speechless. I have heard of tragedy before, but the news I have just received has taken me to a place I never wanted to go to for a very long time. How could this have happened, and to him of all people? I am shutting down, becoming numb to everything in my current environment. I wish not to feel anything; pain, joy, sorrow, hope, love, I just want to be numb. This is not the case however, all I fell is pain and sorrow, regret and dismay, wondering about the what ifs of what could have been done different. I am sick to my stomach and no matter what, this knot that is turning round and round inside of me only grows. I am in mourning and wish not to be. I was in this place a year ago now and was ready to be finished myself, and I even tried to accomplish this so, only to fail. So here I sit, writing what someone may have been writing about me not long ago, in pain, sorrow, and mourning over what I almost accomplished.

I have lost a dear friend to suicide. A friend who I looked up to and admired as a man, friend, and brother in Christ Jesus. Having spent a good amount of time with him, I have no opportunity to tell him just how much his faith and words of encouragement have always been to me. He shone the light of Christ like no other man I have ever known. He exemplified an unconditional love for people that was unlike any other I have ever known, whether he knew you or had just met you five minutes ago. He has left behind a wife and two daughters in a tragic state of pain, full of questions, and deeper sorrow than I will ever know. Is telling them I am sorry for their loss really going to help them to cope in this horrible event that will affect them for the rest of their lives? What am I to tell them, That things will get better over time, that they will move past this some day? Sadly, the worst part is that he never reached out to anyone for help or to talk to about his struggles, pain, and sadness. He simply built it up inside of himself until finally he could bare it no longer and felt he was left with only one way out, death. I will be there for my friends who are now without a husband and father, there to listen, pray, and love them whilst they are in this great suffering and more than likely will be doing for a very long time.

I have been listening to someone challenge me in figuring out what my story is and who is writing it. Is it me, or someone else, who knows me better than myself, Christ? Am I humbly submitting to his will for my life so that he may write a story of my life that only he could write? Embarrassing enough, I am not. I am selfish and want to have control of everything in my life. What is the result of my decision to live for myself instead of for Christ? That I am missing out on the man that God wants me to be and the story he wants to write of my life and the glory that he deserves to receive for the many miracles he has performed and wants to still in my life. A break down is coming that I must work through and surrender to Christ so that I may carry on the work that God has called all of us to do, something that my late friend was very good at because he had amazing zeal and passion for sharing God’s abundant love and grace with each person he encountered. This I know will be no easy task to accomplish but I will strive to do my best and not give up. I do not want this tragedy to be over-looked, but remembered as something to fuel my passion for Christ’s love and forgiveness. Do not quit fighting for your loved one’s and make sure to reaffirm them of their value and meaning in your life and the lives of so many others. Our secrets are our worst enemy and unless you bring them to light and expose them they will continue to have power and control over you, bringing you down and as you have read, to a feeling of only having one way out. Help is out there, your story matters to so many that it is best told by you, not for you after you have gone to rest, never to speak to or leave such a direct impact in people’s lives.

Who will carry on your legacy? Who can do what you did for Christ the way that you were able to do? You are irreplaceable and so in your memory we will continue the love and service you showed to all people you encountered. On this somber Monday morning, we have gathered to celebrate your life and our memories of you that are dear to us. As we weep that you are no longer with us, we also are filled with joy that you are finally with your true and perfect father. I myself envy your place of everlasting eternal residence, as many of us wish to be before the throne worshiping our loving father of light.

I will miss you more than you know, as will so many others who have and do and always will love you. My memorable time spent with you shall be cherished for the rest of my life, only leaving me wishing that we had more of them. I will not mourn forever for I know that I will see you again someday in heaven. When that day comes I shall rejoice not only in seeing you but more so in worshiping our creator side by side, seeing your shining smile on your face. Nevertheless, for now I cannot help but to weep over what has happened. Your story was not yet finished being written by God and he had so much more for you to do, bringing him glory in a way that only you could. You decided to finish writing your story though and with a tragic ending no less. You fell into a dark place, shutting everyone out and trying to escape from it at the same time. We however will continue to write your story in our own lives because of the love you have shown us. My words I write in memory of you will not do justice in truly defining and explaining who you were and the impact you made on my life. However, this is a form of my release of the pain and sorrow I am experiencing right now. You are heavy on my heart my friend and will be for a long time. Please know that you are already missed, and always will be until that day comes when all of us who knew and loved you meet up in heaven for eternal celebration of the King.

This is not good-bye to you my friend, but until we meet again, and though it will not be here on earth it will happen elsewhere. We love you and we miss you, and wish you had let us help you before it was to late to do so. Your pain and suffering is over, but ours has just increased upon having lost your amazing God given friendship. Grace and peace be with you, you are loved more than you know. His name was, is, and always will be, Kelly Tescher.

dorothy ain't got... but that wicked witch is something else.

Emma's first ride on a carosel! man she was sure excited, in case you can't tell from her facial expression, she was showing her excitement on the inside. oh who am I kidding, she's only one year old, she had no idea what was going on...



this is Dorothy at her finest... ummm maybe not her finest, but she sure was looking cute that day.

welcome to Oz... with a slap in the face and a kick in the pants!
My nightmare while traveling to kansas for the fourth of July has reaffirmed my total dislike of united airlines, the Denver airport, and traveling outside of the west coast region. A last minute change of my departure gate in Denver caused me to miss my flight to Kansas and seventy-five dollars later I arrived an hour and a half behind schedule and mad as hell. The only nice day during my stay in Topeka was on Saturday and the rest were filled with heavy rain storms and a lack of activities to participate in due to the down pour. There were plenty of good times had with my family members though, which made my trip to Kansas for my aunts sixtieth birthday and mini family reunion worth this trouble and annoyance I have had to endure. I did get to watch the Lesnar/ Carwin fight and end up disappointed with the outcome, however it was fun to have some brewskies with my cousin Brandon, his girlfriend, and my brother Joel at Buffalo Wild Wings. I also got to do some wake boarding, tubing, etcetera on the lake which only happened cause we went out in the rain and my departure day of tuesday was clear, beautiful skies in the morning for an early session on some glassy water.



As my cousin and her husband took me back to the airport we stopped by Cabela's headquarters and saw some amazing bucks on display in their trophy room. upon arriving at the Kansas City airport, I was informed that there was major weather storms going on in Denver and that many of the passengers connecting flights would be missed and rescheduled for the next day. For some reason I had a feeling this would happen to end my trip from hell with complete suffering, frustration, and a total pain in my ass. My flight didn't end up leaving until two hours later and I finally landed in Denver at eleven in the evening, over an hour later than my departure flight left for Boise with out me. I was then stuck in the DIA all night with no dinner to eat cause everything closed down before I could get a bite to eat. what do you do when you're stuck in an airport that feels more like a ghost town? since I was unable to sleep and starving like a homeless man, I did the only thing that made illogical sense, I wandered from one end of the airport to the other like a zombie for six hours to pass time. my flight out would not be leaving until after two in the afternoon so I had time to kill. I tried to occupy my time with shows off of Hulu, but DIA's wifi was horrible and kept shutting down. needless to say, DIA is the worst airport I have ever been in and I hope I never have to fly through there again as long as I live.



finally I arrive back in Boise at four in the afternoon and I am in need of some good deep sleep... which i managed to get a nap in while on a picnic with Beth... who picked me up and brought me food since i had barely even got to eat breakfast. What better way to thank someone than to fall asleep in the park during a picnic with them, right?... man that's classic. Sorry Beth! I was able to get some sleep that night but it was not the same as being in my own bed, even though i slept until after twelve in the afternoon. I ended up spending the rest of the rest of the week in Boise and finally got home to Washington on Friday night about a half an hour after midnight, and finally started to catch up on sleep by sleeping until about two thirty in the afternoon on Saturday. Well enough about me, tell me about you... until next time, word of advice, DON"T EVER FLY THROUGH DIA! Oh yeah, write that down... Now!

what the eff is geo caching?!...

so i have recently been introduced to the wide world of geo caching in the last month and i have thoroughly enjoyed it... aside from the massive amounts of cheat grass i acquire in my hiking boots! how did i come to learn and experience this fine activity you might ask? thanks to one Beth Van Vliet, i have been introduced to being a modern day treasure hunter.

geo caching is a form of glorified treasure hunting, without actual treasure but trinkets found in a water proof box hidden in the wilderness. these "treasure chests" are found using GPS coordinates and a keen eye for hidden objects. it is a great way to get outdoors and enjoy the summer weather as well as involve anyone you know in the adventure of the search for "booty!" many caches that are found encourage you to take a trinket and leave something new, along with leaving an entry of your experience. many caches are also located fairly close to others and so you can find more than one a day and get a good amount of exploration done at the same time. it is quite rewarding and provokes you with a desire to create your own geo cache for others to find and enjoy. there is a geo caching website you can go to, to find geo caches in your area as well. go to www.geocaching.com for more info! best of luck in your future treasure hunting adventures!!!

when prayers are answered before they even leave your mouth...

so this weekend i am in the tri cities of Washington. i left my job to come here and look for new employment and a place to live, and get an idea of what i need to prepare for spiritually, emotionally, financially, and more. sadly, i left my job at big city on a bad note, and before i could pray about what to do for income or a place to live, God was working, fighting, and preparing His plan for me here in Washington. there is a good chance that i will have a job waiting for me when i move here at the end of June, and also have an affordable place to live as well. i hadn't even had time to pray about this weekend yet and still my unvoiced prayers were answered! God is so good to me and yet i am still a fallen child of his, walking a few steps behind him following him with childlike faith, trusting him to provide, not in abundance, but just enough for me to continue to trust in him.

though there are things and people i will miss in Boise, it seems as though my new life is being started for me in Washington and i am being reassured that God is blessing this transition in my life. though sadly i may lose some friendships because of the move, i believe that the friendships that will remain will be because those people saw that the friendship we have with each other was worth working harder for in order to maintain the relationship. to the people who do believe this, i thank you in advance for deeming me worthwhile to pursue such an amazing relationship with me and i am privileged to call you my friend. i can only hope that i can be the friend to you that you are to me. i do not expect anything from you that i would not freely offer or sacrifice for your sake, cause as in all relationships, there must be a balance of give and take, bringing two people closer together, not only to each other, but closer to God.

going off of another post i read, it is time for vulnerability and sharing to occur. my good friend Aubrey has shared and now in an attempt to identify with her, i would like to share ten things, excluding superficial and cliche' answers, that i wish i could change about myself. alongside with my post, i ask that you would share one or two things that you wish you could change about me, that would make me a better person, friend, or other random identity.

1. i would like to be better organized and not so compulsive.
2. be more compassionate to others and not so rude and crass.
3. make smarter choices in certain areas of my life, that have caused me to be very bitter currently.
4. definitely would like to have less injuries occur to my body... i feel older than 25 physically.
5. more dependent on God and less rebellious against him. after all he did create me for his glory and probably not so much to be an aspiring cage fighter!
6. i would like to be more assertive in my relationships and lay healthier boundaries with people.
7. not care so much about pleasing other people and giving in to what they need/want from me... i need to learn to say NO.
8. communicate my thankfulness to others more... an pay their blessings forward to others i encounter.
9. experience God's glory by sharing his love with others more and not being such a hypocritical christian.
10. spend more time listening to God and less time telling him what i am going to do, and that he better make it happen, or else!

here is my list, what is yours? this has been very challenging and rewarding so i encourage you to make a list for yourself. until next time...

Greg

Ch-ch-ch-changes...

so i have some big news for all you who follow my blog posts... i am moving this summer! where to you might ask? i am moving to the tri-cities of Washington state. i will be going to school at the WSU campus in the tri-cities town of Pasco, and hopefully will find an amazing job to replace the one i have here. i love making coffee and fueling people's addictions! I am in need of some change in my life and have decided that getting out of boise for a while would be a good change to apply to my life. this past year has been a bit rough for me in many ways, and so a change of scenery is, in my opinion, going to be healthy for me. if you are worried that i will never come back to Boise, worry not my friends, worry not. my goal is to come back to Boise once a month to visit and keep the few relationships i have here going. who knows what God will do in my life while i am there? maybe this is where he wants me to be? i know that i have not felt as though his desire is for me to stay in Boise, that is for sure. there is a lot to look forward to in my moving, not all change is bad, only the change that one chooses not to embrace. if you have any questions, please feel free to ask...

Man Night!...

so on the weekend of the 24th, i picked up Caleb from his house down the road from mine, for a night of guy time and manliness. first we had some home made enchilada's made by mom,... thanks Laurel! from there we went to the gym, for some kids MMA class action where Bubba (Caleb), got his kicking and punching on and left a good beating on the punching bag! A quick stop by Big City Coffee in the linen district, for some soda pop to drink at none other than How To Train Your Dragon, and on our walk through downtown we had the privilege to watch some breakers' doin' their thing to some sweet beats. Whilst in the movie theater, Caleb said some really funny things that apply to how much of a wimp I am. Things like "you shouldn't be afraid to ask out girls," or " why did you shave your mustache off?, you looked better with one!" It's not every day that a six year old is educating me, so this was a real privilege. After we got out of the movie, it was time to head home... but only after stopping to buy some 'mallows for toasting on a campfire in the back yard before bed. Soooo good. in the morning we had some delicious bacon and eggs for breakfast before swimming at the YMCA. After we swam we had some chocolate milk and chilled at Big City for a bit before going home to hang out outside and later paint a picture. when i took him home, Caleb had a surprise waiting for him from aunt Roxie and uncle John... a new bike that fit him to ride in the neighborhood! We had a great time, and when i got home i was wiped out and took a nice long nap! hopefully next time we do a man day/ night it will involve some camping in the wilderness!

A Quarter Of A Century Ago...

So last week i had a milestone occur in my life, and as a result of that milestone i can now say that wisdom is coming my way. Having spent the first twenty five years of my life learning and trying to retain pertinent information on life and my purpose here on earth, i am a quarter of a century old and not sure what the next twenty five years will entail. Though i am still learning and will continue to learn for the rest of my life, i do believe that i have acquired some wisdom in regards to certain things and plan to use my "wisdom" for good. does the fact that i can grow a sweet fu man chu mustache count towards my acquisition of wisdom? i say yes! There is much to ponder upon as to the outcome of my future, will i travel, move to another city, start my career, finish college, find a girl to put up with me? I have no answer to any of this, but hopefully God does. i have no control of what will happen since i am surrendered to God's will in my life, and though i am given freewill to make choices, unless i feel his movement i will be immobile. i was asked by a friend what the most significant thing i have done in my first twenty five years was, and after much thought about it i came to the conclusion that my trip to Ukraine's capital of Kiev. I went there to serve God and reach out to others and share his love with them through helping them to improve their english reading and speaking by reading the bible and having conversation about what they thought was going on in the stories that we read. will i ever get to experience that kind of service again in life, see the world and its amazing history, love strangers with God's love? only time will tell. what will your next quarter of a century bring you in life?

Man Day!... Playin' With The Boys...

So yesterday, Caleb and myself went and had a man day together. We started off at the YMCA where we were denied swimming access, the jerks! We then proceeded to clean out my messy car before grabbing some hot chocolate from Big City Coffee in the linen district, which was quite delicious i might add. we ended up at my friend Trevor's house where we went out back to his man shed, which is really a barn, to look and admire dead, "stuffed" animals that he and his dad had shot over the years. Caleb, who is six years old, soon to be seven in june, found this site truly amazing and awesome. the dead deer, elk, buffalo, bears, coyotes, cougars, and many racks of antlers and piles of bones were very intriguing and inspiring for future hunting endeavors to be had, and trophies to be shot. oh yeah, and lets not forget the freshly skinned raccoon roadkill hanging by it's hind legs, and bloody and beaten from the car that hit it that Trevor had found the day before! after seeing the barn, we headed outside to shot some BB guns and work on our aim. Caleb i must say did quite well at shooting the cans, while i need to work on my aim. Lunch followed this and then back into the barn we went to learn how to make indian artifacts, or better known as arrowheads. Caleeb has a very good imagination when it comes to making and inventing things. To prepare for the evening events, we took a short nap before heading over to Combat Fitness to do some MMA training and also to lift some weights. Caleb is a very strong six year old boy who though rough and tough can instantly transition into a soft caring person, and watching this happen is truly awesome. from the gym we headed home to eat some dinner and watch some cage fighting on TV. this was our man day, which was a lot of fun and prepared us for future man days to come.

a great weekend with the fam.

with a new tattoo on and a good weekend of work, family, and fights on the versus channel, i am happy to say that things may be on the up and up. having worked friday, saturday, and sunday, saturday being the worst of them with our food prep fridge breaking down, i am happy to say that the tips were good and life outside work was very enjoyable. on friday evening after i was done with work i went over to the families house to watch some march madness with trent and have a few lienenkugels with him. great times were had until i woke up to go to work at 5 a.m. and had a massive headache and was very incoherent for a bit. saturday after work i went over to the families house again to watch the kids so trent and laurel could go on a date. the kids and i went to shopko to get squirt guns and and then to little ceasars for some delicious pizza. from there we went to camels back park to eat, drink and be merry. i nice hike up the hill for a view of the downtown area and north end of boise was quite nice. once back at the house it was time to watch where the wild things are and eat some ice cream. more work o sunday morning at 5:30 a.m. and then after that it was time o watch some cage fighting! great night of fights. here is a pic of the new tat and some fun with the kids. enjoy!

catching my breath...

well i haven't posted to the blog in about a month now and so i thought i might fill in the gaps of time. school is crazy busy, work has picked up on business and the amount of customers coming in, training at combat fitness is a slow road back with my neck and back being stiff and weak, and i have been planning to get a tattoo for some time now. i had originally planned on going to rose hill tattoo shop, but unfortunately for them the "artist" that was going to do my piece, canceled on me twice, the second time having had me show up and wait for almost an hour past the start time before anyone even showed up to tell me that the artist once again had to cancel. no phone call, text , or courtesy shown. I had even called the shop the day before to confirm, and was told yes, come in. needless to say, i have decided to go elsewhere with my business, and i have a lot of work to get done on my arms so the way i see it, they had an opportunity to have a repeat customer and they showed me that they are incapable of running a professional business with serious cliental. Chalice Tattoo, run by Darcy Nutt is where i will be going tomorrow to get my tat done by Bart Bingham of California. he is a guest to the shop this week and so i am stoked to have him work on me after having checked out his portfolio on myspace and other places on the net. pictures will be posted next week.

ahh... Big City life!

so apparently the coffee shop I work at in downtown boise, Big City Coffee and Cafe in the linen district, is now a hot spot for celebrities to come to. This last sunday on the 31st of January, Edward Norton came in and had some breakfast and coffee with an associate of his, and hung out for three hours. Crazy I know! The best part of it, is that not many people recognized him since he was dressed in very relaxed clothing and wearing a hat. Because of that he was not swarmed upon by crazy fans of Fight Club and the 25th Hour, and he was able to be just another person receiving quality service from the Big City staff. I started training again at Combat Fitness, and am super sore. However my doctors are worried that I may overdue my training and fall back in my cognitive healing. They have informed me that I should try to do minimal exercise so that no concussion symptoms occur, and slowly progress to a more moderate and eventually heavy amount of exercise. I am not to happy with what they said, however I will do my best to follow their guidelines so that I reach full recovery faster and without any induced problems. the second and third weeks of school have gone fairly well, though I am still trying to adjust after the month long break. well I'm off to work now but will post again soon. i wonder who will be in today?!

week one or weak one?... you decide

so i managed to survive the first week of the spring semester! i go to school from 7:30 in the morning until 6 in the evening on tuesdays and thursdays, and have four classes lasting the length of the day. cultural geography, western civilizations to the 17th century, art foundations 108 - 3D art with studio time right after lecture, and my favorite class of all, controversial issues in canada! i have already written three papers since tuesday, and have at least 4-5 hours of homework a night and art projects galore to complete every other day. i am a bit overwhelmed as of right now s i think about how i will survive the entire semester doing this. i do have some mediocre news to share with everyone as well. i am about to start my training regime for fighting at the end of this next week. however the negative aspect of this is that i was informed by several of my cognitive therapists and doctors that i should never fight in the cage or partake in sparring at the gym. i was told that if i sustain another severe blow to the head similar to the one i took when i was hit by the car almost six months ago now that i could become worse of than i already am in regards to my memory and physical ailments. this news has brought some depression on as i have no way to challenge myself the way that cage fighting did. i will now have to strictly train for enjoyment and to stay in immaculate physical shape for the ladies that aren't in my life. yes you read that correctly. so this is my current status in week one as the weak one. i am looking forward to going to see The Ghost Inside and Fallen Dreams on wednesday @ The Venue. this will be my first official hard core concert! hopefully i will make it out alive with punching someone in the face. closing in the words of Paramore, "that's what you get when you let your heart out heart..."

what to do with a day off?

so today i woke up from a night of restful sleep, thanks to my sleep aid! i met up with my brother and sister in-law and drove up into the wilderness to look for animals to shoot, and also take some pictures of as well. i must say that i really enjoy the outdoors and nature. here are some photos i took of the many deer we saw.






i am ready for hunting season to be back so i can shoot one of those deer and eat it for dinner! a bike ride in town also took place and i am hoping that tomorrow will be enjoyable as i head back to university studies. when you have a day off don't waste it on your couch, get outside and do something enjoyable! don't hate me cause you ain't me!

when life sucks...

so i have been back in boise for two weeks now and immediately when i got back i found out i had to work. how did o found out i had to work you wonder? with a wake up call telling me i was supposed to be at work instead of in bed sleeping. i have worked just shy of 80 hours and now i will be back in school on tuesday. sadly so many of us, me included wish that life could be a constant vacation. however my memory of the trip is a bit hazy do to the fact that my short-term memory is not the best. my trip to california at the end of 2009 was much needed and much to short. sunny days and warm weather was so nice to have. now life sucks yet again here in the "208", though i am looking forward to starting my second semester of college, i dread living in boise, idaho. i am glad to inform that i have purchased a new bike for commuting around town and to school! as i wait for sleep and listen to Anberlin while writing this post i ponder upon my purpose in life and whether i will ever succeed at the things i set out to do. i have been extremely sad lately, anticipating something bad to happen and also that i am on my way to another emotional breakdown, which may have some extremely negative outcomes. i am trying to fight this feeling but it has been an everyday struggle for quite some time now. will i ever be happy, with myself, with life? will i ever be normal? what is normal anyways? it is such a relative term that i believe can no longer be defined. there is only abnormal. as i feel my "sleeping aid" kick in i should probably try to let it take its effect on me but i will fight it so that i may rest longer through the night. in the famous words of Anberlin, "you only stand to break my heart, i can tell it by the way you run away." when life sucks, listen to Anberlin!

San Diego livin'

so i am once agian in the airport waiting for my flight home to dreary dreaded Boise, Idaho. i will miss this excellent weather, the delicious In And Out burgers i ate all week long, as well as my extended family members i got to visit. double doubles and neopalitan shakes were almost a daily snack for me! i was able to go to the SDMA and see some amazing piantings, jewlery, drawings, and sculptures while there. i could have spent the whole day in there had time permitted. the holiday bowl game between nebraska and arizona was fun even though the game was not very intense do to arizona's lack of skills and size on the field. sunny with a high of 75 has been more than enjoyable compared to the twenty and above weather in boise that includes snow, ice, and crappy drivers. San Diego has really felt more like home this last week as i ponder upon the fact that it has been ten years since my last true visit, and i hope to return home sometime soon. in the famous words of Anberlin, "they lied when they said the good die young!" til next time...